The secret to digital dating for the ageing Millennial

July 5, 2017

Millennials have to be the most spoken about generation. Or perhaps it’s simply because of technology. There are so many different platforms on which you can gather information we might just be hearing more about this generation. Whatever the reason, Millennials are in the spotlight. They’re criticised at every turn. And they’ve been broken up into two categories, your “normal” Millennial and your ageing Millennial.


So are you a Belieber or is your vibe more Drake?


If Bieber is more your baby sister’s style then you’ll remember successfully getting through school without your friend Google. And that makes you an ageing Millennial. If you know how to use all the new tech but you remember your first landline number off by heart then you’re, yup you guessed it, an ageing Millennial. And if you’re aggravated by this point then you’re not alone.


Ageing Millennials don’t understand the need for seven different apps to decide on a restaurant for Saturday night dinner. And they don’t understand dating apps. Because ageing Millennials grew up in a time when you met people through friends and through social gatherings. Swiping right doesn’t sit well as the new type of romance.


But dating happens online nowadays whether you’re into it or not


The average ageing Millennial is uninterested in online dating because they feel awkward about the entire situation. The idea that you can sit around looking like a slob while judging a menu of potential partners entirely on their looks doesn’t sit well with many people. But young Millennials have accepted that this is simply how it works. Whereas your ageing Millennial wants to polish off their fancy ladies shoes or gentlemanly brogues and head out to the local “scene” to check out talent.  


So ageing Millennials are finding the dating scene particularly awkward lately. If you’re about to get off the bench and enter the dating game, and you’re an ageing Millennial, then here’s how you navigate this strange new world.


One dating app at a time


Don’t overdo it on the amount of dating apps you sign up for or you’ll end up a hot mess. If you’re not a social media fundi then you possibly find it all a bit anxiety-inducing. Keeping up with an ever-changing Twitter feed is no fun unless you absolutely adore social media. So sticking to one or two dating apps is more than enough for you to handle.


Just because it asks for information doesn’t mean you have to overshare


Most dating apps and websites ask you to fill out a profile. But this doesn’t mean you have to share all your info. Most times you don’t even have to answer every question. We live in an age of information overload and even though you’re dating digitally you’re allowed to still have an air of mystery around you. A good rule of thumb is to put information on your dating profile that you’d be happy to share with the bartender at your local pub.


Ask for what you want


Most modern dating sites and apps allow you to specify what you’re looking for in a partner. This includes everything from physical characteristics (must be tall because you’re close to six foot) to dealbreakers (non-smokers only) and belief systems (religion or lack thereof). So don’t be afraid to put forward a detailed request. If you don’t ask you won’t get. And if you find that there’s no one interested then perhaps you could reevaluate what you’re looking for. After all, how important is it really that they love sci-fi movies?


Don’t allow yourself to be discouraged


Just because the dating scene has changed and you’re feeling unsure of yourself, that doesn’t mean you should be discouraged from trying. Also, don’t just settle because you’re lonely and feeling unloved. Call up your best friends on those lonely nights. Because choosing to become involved with someone just because they’re there and you can, could end in a disaster far worse than just feeling lonely. Remember, the person you decide to date should be someone you really connect with and who you can be friends with. Far too often we decide to become involved with someone because they’re making an effort and we haven’t assessed how we truly feel about them.


Digital dating for an ageing Millennial can end up feeling laborious. You could end up spending nights on the couch scrolling endlessly and finding no one who sparks your interest. You may connect with someone who’s conversation bores you to death or you might meet up with someone who completely irritates you. All of these negative instances are to be expected. And it’s okay to just nip it in the bud and say your goodbyes.

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